some kiswahili (kenyan methali) The latest version

Mwenda pole ,ako na speed governor. 2. Fahali wawili wakipigana, wa Ikolomani ndio hushinda 3. Usiuone wembamba wa reli ukadhani haiwezi n'golewa. 4. Palipo na kuku wengi hapakosi mluhya 5. Usipo ziba ufa ..mwisi iko chungulia 6. Palipo na wazee hakuna technology 7. Mtoto wa nyoka ni bureee buree tu buree kabisa!! 8. Asiyekubali kushindwa ni Raila 9. Chelewa chelewa, utahata news za saa moja 10. Mbio za sakafuni hazihitaji viatu mbio za siasa huishia State House 11. Anayefunzwa na ulimwengu hujua risasi si dengu 12. Hasira ya Jaluo furaha ya Mseveni 13. Ukistaajabu ya Musa hujayaona ya Mseveni 14. Dalili ya mvua ni mbio za watu wa Nairobi 15. Mgaagaa na upwa hula wali na mbwa 16. Mwenda Homabay na Rusinga, marejeo ni Migingo

The chicken Trick mail (be careful)

 

NO OFFENSE!

Be careful !!......It may LOOK like chicken but is it REALLY chicken ??
 




RATS
 
 




BURNING THE HAIR OFF THEM
 
 




WASHING THEM BEFORE COOKING
 
 




CUTTING THEM UP INTO PIECES THAT SIMULATE CHICKEN PARTS
 
 




PREPARED FOR DEEP FRYING
 
 




WELL SEASONED TO TASTE GREAT!!!!
 
 




ALL DONE AND READY TO EAT!!!
 
 




CLOSER LOOK
 
 




                                    tule mboga majani tuu,  (lets take vegetables)

BE VERY CAREFUL WHEN EATING OUT AT YOUR LOCAL      
     RESTAURANT.......ESPECIALLY hoteli za kihindi!!(especially Indian hotels)

The lady over 30, just think about her....

THIS HAS BEEN WRITTEN BY A MAN.. This is for all you girls 30 years and over..... and for those who are turning 30, and for those who are scared of moving into their 30's...AND for guys who are scared of girls over 30!!!!.... This was written by Andy Rooney from CBS 60 Minutes. Andy Rooney says: As I grow in age, I value women who are over 30 most of all. Here are just a few reasons why: A woman over 30 will never wake you in the middle of the night to ask, "What are you thinking?" She doesn't care what you think. If a woman over 30 doesn't want to watch the game, she doesn't sit around whining about it. She does something she wants to do. And, it's usually something more interesting. A woman over 30 knows herself well enough to be assured in who she is, what she is, what she wants and from whom. Few women past the age of 30 don’t give a damn about what you might think about her or what she's doing. Women over 30 are dignified. They seldom have a screaming match with you at the opera or in the middle of an expensive restaurant. Of course, if you deserve it, they won't hesitate to shoot you, if they think they can get away with it. Older women are generous with praise, often undeserved. They know what it's like to be unappreciated. A woman over 30 has the self-assurance to introduce you to her women friends. A younger woman with a man will often ignore even her best friend because she doesn't trust the guy with other women. Women over 30 couldn't care less if you're attracted to her friends because she knows her friends won't betray her. Women get psychic as they age. You never have to confess your sins to a woman over 30. They Always Know. A woman over 30 looks good wearing bright red lipstick. This is not true of younger women. Once you get past a wrinkle or two, a woman over 30 is far sexier than her younger counterpart. Older women are forthright and honest. They'll tell you right off if you are a Jerk if you are acting like one! You don't ever have to wonder where you stand with her. Yes, we praise women over 30 for a multitude of reasons. Unfortunately, it's not reciprocal. For every stunning, smart, well-coiffed hot woman of 30+, there is a bald, paunchy relic in yellow pants making a fool of himself with some 22-year-old waitress Ladies, I apologize. For all those men who say, "Why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free". Here's an update for you. Nowadays 80% of women are against marriage, why? Because women realize it's not worth buying an entire Pig, just to get a little sausage!